I started therapy last week.
Off and on for most of my adult life I’ve struggled with depression and anxiety. I normally just plowed my way through it and toughed it out and allowed it to run its course. I don’t talk about the depths of my struggles with many people (very few people ever) and have chosen to mostly suffer in silence for the majority of that time. I’ve become very good at putting on a brave face in public. People who work or are close with me will probably be surprised to hear that given my normal happy, upbeat, and positive persona I tend to portray.
But I just don’t really have the energy, nor do I feel like I need to do that anymore. Why I felt that way to begin with is probably mostly to do with the pressure we feel growing up to have our shit together and “be strong.” Especially as a man since we tend to have fewer role models who discuss this topic honestly and openly.
Well, I’m realizing that isn’t true strength and am seeking help and opening up more about it to mostly help myself, but a passion of mine is helping others so that is why I’m sharing my struggles more publicly to be a role model for people who choose to struggle in silence. As cliche as it is, you seriously don’t have to.
A funny thing keeps happening every time I’m honest with someone about how I’m doing, I feel a little better. Like a weight is lifted off my shoulders each time I choose to express myself.
So, what does that have to do with Forrest Gump?
Well if you’ve seen the movie, in the very beginning Forrest is in leg braces and unable to run. Two bigger kids frequently bully Forrest and he is usually rendered helpless. He tries to get away on his own, but they’re too fast or he’s too slow since his legs are in braces. His run is awkward.
But then something happens that I feel relates to my current situation and many others.
One day the bullies decided to chase Forrest with their truck.
Forrest takes off with that awkward run in his braces. His best friend Jenny is famously yelling,
“RUN FORREST RUN!”
So he keeps running.
Finally, he starts to run so fast that his braces slowly start to come apart piece by piece until they are no longer attached.
This allows Forrest to begin to pick up some momentum. Maintain a regular running pattern (as a trainer I’m skeptical of the validity of this physical phenomenon) and what do you know? Forrest is basically a track star and is able to run away with ease.
What does this have to do with mental health?
The bullies represent depression, anxiety, life stress, all the things that continue to hound us. They come up with different methods and tactics to try and bring us down. We struggle to fight them on our own.
Jenny represents all of those who are in your support team. It could be friends, families, co-workers, or professional care such as a therapist.
You are Forest. The braces he wears on his legs represent all the self-limiting beliefs, all the self-doubt, all the reasons you tell yourself you can’t do something or don’t deserve something.
Each time you open up to someone, each time you admit you are struggling, each time you are honest with yourself and others, each time you perform an act of self-care those braces get a little looser. At first it might look awkward like Forrest’s run. It might not be effective, and the bullies might catch up to you somedays. But the further you run, the more proactive actions you take the closer you are to busting out of the braces. Once those braces break off, you’ll begin to feel like who you were meant to be instead of a limited version and open yourself up to endless opportunities.
This doesn’t mean you should literally run away from our problems. This means in order to address our problems we need to be able to develop the skill set to endure, confront, and solve the issues and struggles we live with day to day.
What is keeping the braces on your legs? And what are you going to do about that?
Who is your Jenny? What do you need from them?
It’s time to bust out of those braces and RUN FORREST RUN!
I hope this helps you or someone you know. Thank you for reading, as always.
Tyler